Practicing self-kindness with Leah's Fieldnotes
May 30, 2023 – [[read-time]] minute read
In a world where attention spans seem increasingly shorter and everything is competing for whatever’s left, Leah Wei is going in the opposite direction. The 26-year-old creator got started on YouTube doing vlogs and fashion hauls in high school — but soon evolved her channel towards slower-paced storytelling through the use of candid footage and beautiful cinematography.
And it makes total sense, given her background in graphic design. One look at her vlogs and you’ll find ethereal transitions and typographies, adding a flair of romanticism and curiosity to her life journey. Over the past few years, Leah has masterfully combined that style of editing with her raw openness to discuss topics that can often feel taboo within the Asian communities — from dating to mental health to sexuality.
We talked to Leah to learn more about how she came to develop her unique editing styles and where her journey takes her next.
Content creation has become second nature to a lot of young people — did it ever surprise you that being a YouTube creator could be a career?
Leah: I started making videos on and off after high school for fun. I never thought that it could become my career, though in the back of my head I always thought it would be such a cool job. After graduating from university, I felt pretty lost. I knew I didn’t want a design office job but I still wanted a creative medium to express myself. After a lot of existential dread and encouragement from friends, I decided to try making weekly videos and sent out my first sponsorship pitch, which I realized was pretty similar to making design pitches!
With a background in graphic design, did figuring out your vlog editing and storytelling styles come naturally to you? Or did you feel like it took a lot of experimentation to get there?
I think about what my videos say about me as a person rather than what does this say about me as an editor? It's just been a mirror to look at myself and realize where I was really hard on myself or where I can be more loving or gentle or encouraging.”
Leah WeiLeah: I think it’s always been a constant process of experimentation, though not always in a conscious way. For example, when I used to make lookbooks, I always asked myself “What can I do differently that I haven’t done or seen before?” or “How can I film this in a more fun and interesting way, not only for the viewer but also for myself?” I still ask myself those questions to this day even though my content has changed since then.
After graduating university, I started channeling my love for typography and editorial layouts into my videos. It made the editing process way more fun when I made my captions dance around the screen rather than always on the bottom. These days my curiosity has moved into the technicality of filming and color grading so captions are back to normal, but my interest in user experience still remains: How is a person's eyes interacting with the screen that you’ve designed or experiencing it overall? I think my UX/UI background probably subconsciously informs my creative process too.
What has watching your vlog and storytelling evolve over the years taught you about yourself?
Leah: I've learned a lot about myself as a person, witnessing where anxieties come up or where I create friction within myself through the creative process There were points where I felt like every video had to be better than the other one,to prove to myself that I could be better and I realized, “Oh my god, I’m very hard on myself”. And then at the end of the day it's like, yeah, I could keep making videos better but you can't truly measure that and that's not very healthy to have that mindset.
So now, I think about what my videos say about me as a person rather than what does this say about me as an editor? It's just been a mirror to look at myself and realize where I was really hard on myself or where I can be more loving or gentle or encouraging to myself.
It’s taught me that I really like change. Although the essence of my channel or personality remains, my editing style, the videos I create and ways that I film never stay the same because I get quite bored redoing the same things. Once something feels comfortable, I want to try something I’ve never tried before.
What would you say to a friend if they were in that situation? If they were feeling down, you probably wouldn't yell at them to get back to work so why do that to ourselves?”
Leah WeiEvery creator experiences self-critical thoughts and burnout — how have you learned to balance these negative emotions?
Leah: There’s no quick fix. You just have to consistently practice being kinder to yourself. I still struggle with anxiety and burnout but I’m slowly getting better at self soothing, prioritizing rest and encouraging myself. What would you say to a friend if they were in that situation? If they were feeling down, you probably wouldn't yell at them to get back to work so why do that to ourselves?
I only put out two videos a month now so I have time to improve the quality of my work and rest. Being realistic with my energy and cutting down my output has really helped me though I’m still observing where I need to set better boundaries.
It’s all a gradual process but seeing just how much some people know themselves when they’re 50 makes me excited to stay on this journey of figuring out what I need.
Where do you draw some of your inspiration from, whether it’s design or creators you love?
Leah: I love following design studios, type foundries, architects and artists. Watching films and seeing what other YouTubers like Her 80m2 and Beau Miles are making definitely inspire me a lot. What inspires me the most, though, are the people I see living very alternative lifestyles. Even if you're not necessarily saying “I want to live that specific life,” it’s still empowering to just see people doing things differently and ask yourself, “What does my ideal life look like?”
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We’re now somehow halfway through the year. What are some goals you have for yourself for the rest of 2023?
Leah: I want to keep practicing being more intuitive with when I need breaks and being easier on myself. I've been reading a lot more books on relationships and attachment styles to try and understand myself better.
I will be going to Spain in June to learn how to sail, which I'm really excited for. However, when I travel with deadlines and videos to edit, it can get really overwhelming for me. So this will be a good opportunity to figure out a healthy way of navigating that, whether that’s traveling less or setting a structured work schedule while I’m away.
I'm excited to keep using these different opportunities whether I'm living at my Mom's or living on a boat to see how I can find a balance between work and play. And doing all that in a patient and loving way. I think that's the main goal for the rest of this year.
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